Flu or Love Bug?
by SonicXMinagirl
Summary: OMG! Ichigo finds Kisshu clonked out in front of her house. He must be sick! Will true love blossom? A very random Oneshot


A.N. After reading so many of these _lovely, wonderful, perfect, _and _fluffy_ sick Kisshu stories, I have decided to jump on the bandwagon! Nya! :3

-O-

"_You'll never believe what happened Ichigo! You're father and I have somehow won a free cruise despite never entering any contests! Isn't that grand!?"_

"_Sadly it's only a trip for two. So you'll have to stay home…DON'T LET ANY BOYS IN THE HOUSE! YOU'LL GET RAPED!"_

"_My darling, you need to relax! Ichigo is a responsible teenage girl. Besides it's not like a horny and possibly insane alien from another planet will try to get into the house because he is sexually obsessed with our daughter. That's absurd! Now be good girl Ichigo, and Mommy and Daddy will bring you a souvenir! Bye bye!"_

The conversation from the night before replayed in Momomiya Ichigo's head as she brushed her ruby red hair. She giggled and took her time despite running late. Looking kawaii was way more important than being on time to school today. The reason behind this unusual logic was since her parents were gone, Ichigo was going to invite her crush, Aoyama Masaya over after school. Then maybe they could take their romance to the next level! The red head shamelessly giggled and blushed at the idea.

As soon as Ichigo pulled her hair back into the usually piggy-tails, she spritz on some strawberry body spray. After inspecting herself in the mirror and adjusted the red bow on her school uniform, she was ready to go. The red head rushed down the stairs and out the door. Once outside, she skipped across clouds of the nine variety. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and Aoyama-kun was waiting for her! Ichigo increased her speed, only to- with a small shriek- fall flat on her face.

"Ow ow ow…" She whimpered and slowly pulled herself up. Besides a slightly scraped up knee, she didn't seem to be too hurt. Ichigo grabbed the bag she dropped and patted her hair, wondering what made her trip. She wasn't _that_ clumsy… The red head turned to glare at the object that made her fall and gasped.

There laying on the pathway in front of her house unconscious was none other than Ikisatashi-

"Kisshu!" Ichigo breathed. She quickly grabbed for her pendant, but then giggled. She was being silly. The alien couldn't do anything to her, not like that anyways. The red head slowly approached the alien, and took a deep breath before turning him over. Despite the fact that Kisshu was unconscious he looked perfectly fine. "I wonder what happened…?" Ichigo muttered as a strange feeling slowly crept up her body. She needed to help him. "I don't care that he has stolen my lip virginity and has tried to make me his sex slave and probably would give me an alien STD–Since he strikes me as the man whore type- a number of times! It does not matter that he wants to slaughter my dear Aoyama-kun and drink his blood in front of me and murder or enslave every other human including my parents, my best friends, and co-workers! It makes no difference to me that he wants to kill Bambi and all the cute animals along with our environment! I, Momomiya Ichigo will nurse Kisshu back to full health because I can, gosh darnit!" Ichigo declared with a burst of passion.

After the sakura petals flying around her during the speech magically poofed away, Ichigo went to drag Kisshu's body into the house. She was pleasantly surprised to find that she could lift him. Seems he really was as light as he looked. She positioned him into the bridal style and started to walk. Kisshu's head found its way between Ichigo's breasts and somehow stayed in that spot the entire journey.

Once she got him into her bedroom, the red head made sure to get him all snuggly comfortable, then put a wet rag on his forehead. The cat girl figured he had the flu since the alien's body felt so warm. Now that that was settled, Ichigo needed to change out of her school uniform. After glancing back to make sure Kisshu was still unconscious, the red head opened her closet. Her chocolate brown eyes widened when she found a skimpy nurse outfit. "Where did this come from?" She muttered, but then clapped her hands. Since she was acting as Kisshu's nurse it would be the perfect thing to wear! "Alright!" Ichigo declared after putting on the costume and turning to the still sleeping Kisshu. "Being kind to Kisshu and letting my guard down is out of character for me. I don't know what to do with myself!" She giggled before walking over to and climbing onto the bed. "Kisshu…"

Strangely the sight of the alien in such a state did strange things to Ichigo's body. Her heart began to quicken in pace and her lower stomach began to heat up. In fact, she could feel a pulse there. "What is this feeling?" She moaned and wrapped her arms around her chest before moaning some more. It couldn't be that Kisshu's illness was making her love him for absolutely no reason…could it? It was completely illogical. It was as if a force sitting in front of large screen were controlling her emotions.

Ichigo flinched and felt her already hot and bothered body increase in temperature when Kisshu sat up. Before she could react though, he fell limp on top of her. "I-it must be a symptom of the illness…" Ichigo told herself and sighed in ecstasy as the supposedly unconscious alien began feeling up her body. The red head allowed him to do this because she was his nurse. Nurse's had to be nice to their patients or they wouldn't recover.

Her cellphone went off just as the alien's calloused and clawed hands slithered up Ichigo's very short nurse skirt. "Oh!" The teenage girl reluctantly pushed Kisshu off of her and answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Ichigo this is Shiragane Ryou! Why aren't you at work!?"

"Uh…"

"You're harboring that space creature aren't you?"

"Wha-!?"

"I knew it! You dirty skank! How dare you help the enemy! Even though in the past I have risked my life for you and the other Mews, even injecting myself with cat DNA, I will ignore my crush on you and slaughter the character the creators intended for me to be by hunting down and killing you and your family just because I'm mad at you! Sayonara Ichigo!" With that, Ryou hung up.

"Um okay…?" Ichigo carelessly tossed her phone across the room before looking back down at Kisshu. "Uh…what was I doing before that?" She asked herself. "And…it feels like I started my period…" The red head got up to change, but was distracted by the doorbell. "I'll get it!" She yelled and raced to the door. Her heart fluttered when she saw it was Aoyama Masaya. "Aoyama-kun!"

The dark haired boy smiled. "Hi Ichigo. For some reason that is not even plausible considering how devoted I am to you, I was going to break up with you and act like a watered down version of the alien who sexually harasses you, while he acts like a slightly more exciting version of me, but I really like that sexy outfit you're wearing so I change my mind." He said and then flashed her a winning smile that came with bishie-sparkles.

"Fine by me…" Ichigo sighed as the sparkles flashed around her. Once they faded, she let him into the house.

"So why weren't you at school today?" Masaya asked as Ichigo led him to the living room couch.

"Oh..uh…um..erm…" Ichigo couldn't tell him she was taking care of Kisshu. Luckily once the two sat down, her crush changed the subject by snuggling close to her and flicking the bell on her choker. The two began to giggle, but something unknown began to repel Ichigo.

"What's wrong?" Masaya asked, noticing the red head's distressed expression.

"I don't know…" Ichigo honestly answered. She could hear a voice in her head. It sounded like it belonged to a whiny fanbrat.

"Get away from him! He's an ugly treehugger! You only belong to Kisshu! You belong to him! YOU BELONG TO HIM!"

"SHUT UP!" Ichigo screamed and ran out of the room and up the stairs. "I won't let you mess things up for me random voice in my head!" She hissed as she stomped up the stairs to her bedroom. She figured if she made Kisshu leave then the voice would also leave her alone. "Kisshu get out!" Ichigo yelled after kicking open the door. She was met by a very surprising sight. There on her bed, naked, was Kisshu.

"Aw but Koneko-chan- or should I say Nurse Joy, I wanted to thank you for nursing back to health." He purred and grasped onto a certain appendage. "Mr. Quiche does too."

"DO IT!" The fangirl voice in her head screamed. "It'll be like true love, cause y'know having sex is love and the guy would never ever leave you ever! Oh and don't worry about getting preggers or catching aids because that only happens to the other person."

"Oh what the heck!" Ichigo snapped as she ripped the nurse outfit off and walked over to Kisshu. She was tired of arguing with the naggy voice."Ikumi-sama is probably rolling in her grave." She muttered as she climbed onto the bed.

"Don't be silly Koneko, Ikumi-sama's aliveI believe and this is fanfiction. She'll never know how bad we're slaughtering her creation." Kisshu said before kissing Ichigo and crawling on top of her. The two began doing their thing for ten straight hours, (beat that Edward and Bella!)completely forgetting that Masaya was sitting in the room right under them and that Ryou was out to kill Ichigo's family.

…And they lived happily ever after!

-O-

A.N. Okay…this was originally intended to be a horror story, but it ended up as a parody.


End file.
